Marble Armrests for the Trump-Kennedy Center?

The President is hard at work on his legacy

When I heard that President Donald J. Trump was working on marble armrests for the seats at the Kennedy Center, my immediate thought was, “Why?” There is a good reason that world-class concert halls and opera houses don’t have them—they are uncomfortable. That is why, perhaps, nobody has ever seen or done them before, as Trump wrote on Truth Social.

Why might Donald Trump think marble armrests are a great idea? One explanation is that he has rarely, if ever, attended a classical music concert or an opera, at least as far as I have heard.

Donald Trump never attended a single event at the then-Kennedy Center during his first term of office. This includes The Kennedy Center honors, which Trump hosted this year. (Trump has joked about awarding himself an award at next year’s event).

Since Trump took over the Kennedy Center, and especially since he had his name installed on the side of the building, ticket sales have plummeted. Thus, I guess, fewer people will suffer the discomfort inherent in marble armrests.

Trump has not yet indicated whether the seating for the Ultimate Fighting Championship matches to be held at the White House in celebration of Trump’s birthday will feature marble armrests. My view is that what is good for the Trump-Kennedy Center is good for the White House, especially for watching a mixed martial arts fight held on the White House lawn.

Want to speculate on what this lunatic does next? Maybe the seats, as well as the armrests, should be marble. Good idea?